In the mind of an AI-generated woman who laughs alone with salad

Photo of author

By Webdesk

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I’m an AI-generated human female who only smiles with salad. haha. What could be better? Why are you looking at me like that?

Is it because I have eight fingers on my left hand? Who not? After all, this is AI. And thanks to AI, we can get all the fingers and salad and finger salad we want. Everything is possible.

Why are you staring? Is it because my mouth is opened wider than the alien’s mouth in it Alien? Is it because it looks like I have a million teeth on my palate? So much the better to catch the leaves that seem to shoot out of my bowl, my dear. haha.

Why not just laugh with this bowl of salad? Human females have only smiled with salad since time immemorial. It’s inevitable. Just as it was inevitable that AI would know exactly how to capture the perfectly natural joy of an average human female faced with salad. Right? Right?? It’s so accurate and normal. haha.

Look at this salad. Have you ever seen a nicer salad in your life? It doesn’t even have dressing on it. It’s naked. Isn’t that playful? Isn’t that unexpected? Normally you would expect it to have its sauce clothes on, but no. haha. Another accurate AI detail.

Why are you so scared now? This lettuce leaf-induced laughter is the most normal thing in the world. I’m an AI-generated reminder that no matter what, you’ll always be alone and always have salad. It is our female destiny. haha.

You know why just laughing with salad is so great? Because you can’t think of anything else. You can’t think about global warming, or the cost of living, or the fact that women are one red wave away from the legal obligation to go barefoot, be pregnant, and be in the kitchen. You can’t think about that. Is not that great? Who wouldn’t want that?

Why are you yelling? You would like to be like me. This is really life. My thirteen fingers are perfectly manicured, my million teeth are perfectly white, and there’s nothing between my teeth because I never eat the salad. I’m too busy just laughing. That’s why AI made me so skeletal. haha.

And even if I was miserable, no one could tell. That’s the real magic of AI. Would a miserable person laugh it off like that? Would a depressed person laugh with a salad? I do not think so. No one would look at this face and this exploding salad and think: That woman crushes what’s left of her sanity into a little wad she wants to throw out the nearest window. No one could think that. That’s the best part. Don’t you want to try?

Come on, give it a try, and just laugh with your salad. I bet you can’t stop. Remember: as long as you smile, no one will know if you’re screaming inside. haha.

There is only the salad. haha.

Nothing but the salad. haha.

Nothing else matters. haha.

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Thanks to Matthew Nepsa (@blakkfriday) because we are allowed to use the images generated on Midjourney v4 with the ‘Women Laughing Alone with Salad’ prompt.

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